,

Self-Awareness: A mental model + exercises

Optimalism is about the journey to becoming the optimal version of yourself.

This journey has to start with an assessment of your self-awareness.

Most people are not aware of their own personal biases and how they limit their ability to be successful in different areas of their lives. A lack of self-awareness can lead to making decisions that are not in line with one’s goals, and can ultimately lead to feeling stuck and frustrated.

There are a few key things that you can do to improve your self-awareness. First, it is important to create a framework for self-awareness. This means taking the time to reflect on your own values, beliefs, and assumptions.

Once you have a clear understanding of your personal worldview, you can then begin to look at how your personal biases may be affecting your life. It is also important to find personal traits that may be limiting your success. This can be done by taking inventory of your strengths and weaknesses. Once you know your areas of opportunity, you can begin to work on improving them.

I view self-awareness as the focus on yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions align with your internal principles.

When my dad died, I set out on a journey to develop my own self-awareness. I’ve found that it is a journey that won’t ever end. This is hard work, but I love it. As you take inputs, meditate, and create outputs, the various paths change. Along the way, I decided to convert my perceptions of self-awareness to a model that would allow for the various changes.

Here is the mental-model that I use to determine who I am and the guiding principles that I use:

Self-Awareness Mental Model

Self-awareness is at the hub and the spokes end with three exercises and five behaviors.

Develop a personal ethos

This is an exercise to examine your character and drive.

Ethos is the character or fundamental values of a person and is the guiding beliefs that characterize an ideology. It is a code that provides a direction for actions (principles) that help fulfill your purpose.

ethos = values + principles

A great way to find your values is guiding quotes from mentors. Go to Twitter, LinkedIn, and Medium. Follow people that are competent and put out informative content, and write down everything that resonates with you. Use this list as your rules for life. Test and revise.

Start each values statement with “I believe” or “I value” or “I am.”

Exercise to set your principles. The definition of a principle is an action that upholds a value. Can be thought of as a life rule. You know your values and what you stand for, now act on them. Stand for what you believe in.

Start each principle statement with “I will” or “I do.”

Revisit 2-3x a year. Review daily.

Discover personal traits

In my case, my personal traits were a blind spot. Here are some exercises that I used to find find mine.

Complete the Enneagram and Myers-Briggs tests. For a couple of hours of work, you’ll be amazed how accurate the results are. 

Another method is to ask 2-3 friends and/or close family for traits that they have observed in you. You want to ask people that will be brutally honest with you AND have your best interests at heart.

Do each of these tests once. Revisit as needed.

Discover your Ikigai

Ikigai is great model for discovering your purpose. 

I recommend that you read Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life by Héctor García and Francesc Miralles.

Revisit 1x a year. Review daily.

Behaviors

  • Read
    • Reading fills the mind. Different perspectives are critical for growth. Reading is the best way to do a deep dive into these perspectives. Blogs, books, and podcasts are the forms of media consumption that I use.
    • Do this every day.
  • Write
    • Writing empties the mind. It creates a structure that can be referenced at any time. I use a second brain, Logseq. Writing in public creates a forum that dually helps others and allows your to get critical feedback.
    • Do this every day. I try to write at least 500 words a day.
  • Meditate
    • Learn to quiet your monkey mind. I use Headspace. Do this every day.
    • Do this every day.
  • Interact
    • Engage with community. IRL and URL. Although IRL > URL.
    • Do this as much as your energy will allow.
  • Train
    • The body can lead the mind.
    • 5x/week at a minimum.

Lastly, it is essential to keep an open mind and be willing to grow and change. Self-awareness is an ongoing journey, and the more you know about yourself, the more successful you can be in all areas of your life.

Comments (

)